Category Archives: self-care

Listening to R. Carlos Nakai “Saguaro Sunset”

And inspired by Carney’s speech at DAVOS

The words have not been lining up
calling to me, insisting I catch them
as waves hit and waves hit
and we struggle to breathe
much less smile for minutes carefree
Who will be left at the end of this
what will be recognizable?
Why, just why?
As what was underneath is exposed
and what do we do with that?
Reveal who we are, must be
As we try to sleep
as we eat and comfort
remembering to hydrate
and breathe as deep as can
As we grieve some and resolve
to be kind. even something small
even once…then again
As we donate and write
and act as if…and wait…
for light, radiant
I am not blind to what is
I absorb as much or a bit more
And then I need an antidote
to the toxic, the tragic, the traumatic
Something to carry me through
believing in better
as a possibility
Can you imagine with me?

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2026

From my poetic journal, 1/22/26

Watching Sunset, Fish Creek, Wis., (C) 2015 MDMikus

Spheres of Influence

(Conversation during surgery with Dr. James Lahti)

The smallest sphere
over which you have some control
some potential influence
is close around you
like an ample balloon skin
In that sphere it is possible
someone might listen
(like you, even)
might pay attention
be swayed, persuaded
by your passion or conviction
might choose to change

The next sphere out
a bit larger, more diffuse
more indirect, you may still
affect the outcome
Your intensity, thoughtfulness
your clarity, honesty
can elevate the energy
enough to shift
something, someone

Start where you are
do not wait for perfection
Do what you can
Breathe. Rest often

The biggest sphere—
over which you have no control
is most of everything
But with others, in the aggregate
you may move recalcitrant mountains
Alone—nothing. Together—maybe
And in that sphere if you
in your naïve intensity
in your innocent propensity
put all your life energy, your belief
in fairness, the way life should be
you will burn out your engine
spinning your tires until they shred
and you are left with a husk

So…don’t do that
spend all your preciousness
on nothing.
FOCUS
your innate inner light where it can
do the most good in the day to day
Join others who are like-minded
Notice and step back when you’ve slipped
into spinning your wheels to no end

Do it for yourself, for all of us
for now and ever. Amen.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2025

From my poetic journal
9/16/25

Advice

IL Route 22, Sept. 2017, copyright MDMikus

1/22/25

Advice

Pace yourself
this is a marathon
not a sprint to the finish
Do not let in
more than you can stand
Mistakes are made
learn from them
no shame, no blame
Apologize if appropriate
forgive if you can
no point in carrying
the extra rock-sack burden
up a steep scree slope
Remember to be grateful
remember to breathe
remember to be where you are
not leaping ahead to some
potential future dark doom
however vividly envisioned.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2025

From my poetic journal.
I keep coming back to these lines as a necessary touchstone-reminder in these chaotic times. “Pace yourself…remember”…if I am getting overwhelmed.

Love and Only Love

This poem has been in my head lately as a reminder that no matter what struggles are going on with my body, to send it love. It is doing its best. A good way to start a new year.

Love and Only Love

Love with every stroke of the shaver,
with every lather of soap, slather of lotion, love.

Not impatience, not frustration, not disgust
at varicose veins, sags, wrinkles, scars,

but love,
with every look, every caress

at the power, the strength,
the beauty of this body in my care.

Love with every glance in the mirror
every wry smile, every tear.

Love, love and only love.
Yes, other thoughts slip in,

let them slip out,
no recrimination, no justification.

Love with every stroke,
healing in my touch, breath

and blink of an eye.
Love, love and only love.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2007

From my poetic journal

Fireworks, Copyright 2014, M D Mikus

To Take My Own Advice

To Take My Own Advice

Some wrongs you can make right
some are not your job to fix
your life to live
Letting go is all you can do
(doing nothing is harder than it looks)

You do what you can
from what you have and where you are
You scan the horizon
and on the good days
you do what you can

And if you remember you are not
the god of anyone
and if you remember no one is like you
and what you might advise
are strung words strained through your filter

flung words flowing on a river
and you have no control whatsoever
of whether or who or when or where
All you can do is breathe out, breathe in
and right what wrongs you can

Be kind to someone
comfort, breathe with them, hold a hand
be gentle, do unto others as…

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2016

From my poetic journal