Category Archives: acceptance

Spheres of Influence

(Conversation during surgery with Dr. James Lahti)

The smallest sphere
over which you have some control
some potential influence
is close around you
like an ample balloon skin
In that sphere it is possible
someone might listen
(like you, even)
might pay attention
be swayed, persuaded
by your passion or conviction
might choose to change

The next sphere out
a bit larger, more diffuse
more indirect, you may still
affect the outcome
Your intensity, thoughtfulness
your clarity, honesty
can elevate the energy
enough to shift
something, someone

Start where you are
do not wait for perfection
Do what you can
Breathe. Rest often

The biggest sphere—
over which you have no control
is most of everything
But with others, in the aggregate
you may move recalcitrant mountains
Alone—nothing. Together—maybe
And in that sphere if you
in your naïve intensity
in your innocent propensity
put all your life energy, your belief
in fairness, the way life should be
you will burn out your engine
spinning your tires until they shred
and you are left with a husk

So…don’t do that
spend all your preciousness
on nothing.
FOCUS
your innate inner light where it can
do the most good in the day to day
Join others who are like-minded
Notice and step back when you’ve slipped
into spinning your wheels to no end

Do it for yourself, for all of us
for now and ever. Amen.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2025

From my poetic journal
9/16/25

Inspired by Tom Prasada-Rao–One More Poem

Tom Prasada-Rao, a lovely singer-songwirter and generous person, gracefully passed on a few days ago after years of cancer treatment. He made the most of his time here and was an influence on those who connected with his music and all of those he worked with. He also inspired through who he was and how he handled his cancer treatment, including me. I have loved his music for years and followed his journey to the end, with so many friends and family visiting, posting photos on Facebook for all to see. This is how you can graciously leave life here, heading into the next chapter. This is one of the poems he inspired. See link at the end for three more.

8/29/19

Face Reanimation Surgery
Tom P-R

A certain acceptance
of how things are
where you have landed
and taking another step
to where you are going
trusting information that
made its way to you
and trusting your intuition
always the future unknown
How much is envisioning
exposing a divine plan?
You wait and heal
and do what you can
All the while, on the good days
patient and loving
no matter the outcome
short or long term
What was taken, restored
not a promise guaranteed
hope, then
grist for imagination
and healing co-creation

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2019

From my upcoming collection, Rippling Out from Folkstage

Inspired by Tom Prasada-Rao

 

Love and Only Love

This poem has been in my head lately as a reminder that no matter what struggles are going on with my body, to send it love. It is doing its best. A good way to start a new year.

Love and Only Love

Love with every stroke of the shaver,
with every lather of soap, slather of lotion, love.

Not impatience, not frustration, not disgust
at varicose veins, sags, wrinkles, scars,

but love,
with every look, every caress

at the power, the strength,
the beauty of this body in my care.

Love with every glance in the mirror
every wry smile, every tear.

Love, love and only love.
Yes, other thoughts slip in,

let them slip out,
no recrimination, no justification.

Love with every stroke,
healing in my touch, breath

and blink of an eye.
Love, love and only love.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2007

From my poetic journal

Fireworks, Copyright 2014, M D Mikus

Read to the End–newly rediscovered poem

Forty-seven years ago May 25 fell on a Saturday (Memorial weekend) and Stephen and I got married at Queen of Peace Church. It was 3 weeks after my graduation from the University of Michigan and 1 week after his first year law school final exams. We were both 22 years old. We were so glad to be together we held onto each other and grinned through most of the ceremony. Even after this pandemic year, that is still true.

Here is a recently rediscovered poem from 21 years ago. When I read it to Stephen he didn’t remember the incident, but really liked the poem, so here it is.

6/29/00

Read to the End

Where can you be?
they are calling
desperate in their way
to find you

in the middle of negotiation
you walked away
stepped out…to where?
Is that when you called

me and left a message
“Talk to you at home”
two hours ago and
you are not home.

Where can you be
run off, run over
leaped off a bridge
into swift green water?

Wandering lost
down familiar, but faint
Chicago city streets?
Sudden flash of “must get out”

sudden loss of stamina
to keep on such a hard
“responsible” course
you set for yourself

thinking your sacrifice
was for us?
Where could you be—
come home to me—and talk

it through, like we always do.
Take this line I throw out to you
hold fast as I pull
you back to the safety of my arms.

**
And now the rest of the story:
You left for a meeting,
an estimate on hail damage,
and came home smiling after.

No danger, no need for worry
who knew? All that energy
wasted except to realize
once again how I love you.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2000

Recently rediscovered from my poetic journal

Cutting our wedding cake, 1974

Margaret and Stephen, Door County, WI

#poem #anniversary #love #poetry #lovepoetry

Only Me, Only You

Only Me, Only You

If
you tried to write these poems
you couldn’t and
if I try to write them
I can’t, but
if I let them flow through me
mix and meld with my life,
deeply still and listening
allow the pen to move
with the words that come…well then.
But
if you
let the words flow through you
you will write in your own voice
not mine and it will mix and meld
with your unique perspective and experience
creating your poems, so
Don’t…
try to
copy anyone
Let, allow, flow
with what message
only you can deliver.
What we’ve been desperate to hear.

Margaret Dubay Mikus
© 2017